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Fake Plastic Trees (Country Hoedown)

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Meditating on Mark 4 has made me think about genuine Christian growth.  Gospel transformation is not like manufacture.  It's agriculture.  It's the word planted deep - fragile but potent, internal but outgoing, gradual but multiplying beyond all expectation.   

Anyway I wrote this kids song on the theme.  Fake Plastic Trees (Country Hoedown) (again, recorded on handheld voice recorder with Yamaha keyboard late at night trying to keep it down!  Anyway, you get the idea.) 

(The underlined word is the first beat of the bar):

Years ago my daddy said
"You my son was born and bred
To grow the greatest fruit seen in the state."
He left me seeds and plenty land
Fertiliser, by the bag
But that just takes too long, and I can't wait (no sir)

Well - a short cut must be found
I aint diggin' in the ground
Maybe fruit trees I can make
Don't really matter if they're fake

I'm stapling fruit upon the tree
Apple, mango and kiwi
Folks are laughing but I don't know why
I'm glueing grapes onto the vine
Nailing up a clementine
While people laugh and holler, point and sigh.

Well - my fruit trees look okay
If you're standing half a mile away
But - it makes it hard to chew
When your fruit is dipped in superglue

Once I thought to "grow" a plum
Stuck it on a pole with some chewing gum
My daddy saw me and he shook his head
"Son you've gone and lost your mind
You're an apple short of a crumble pie
Your tryin to create life from what is dead."

Well - he looked me in the eye
He said "Son, I'll give it one more try
Here's my best advice to you
This is what you need to do"

Fruit takes time, leave it on the vine
Plant it deep, it grows up high
The life within will sprout, you can be sure
The seed has power, let it flower
Through the sun and through the shower
What you sow you'll reap and so much more

Well my Pa is kinda wise
So I heeded his advice
I took my time and planted all his seed
Six months on it grew up slow
A hundred fold of what I sowed
More than all the fruit I'd ever need

Well - success I'd never had
When I listened to my dad
These the words that made a hit
Learn them well and don't forgit

Fruit takes time, leave it on the vine
Plant it deep, it grows up high
The life within will sprout, you can be sure
The seed has power, let it flower
Through the sun and through the shower
What you sow you'll reap and so much more

Well Jesus spoke about His word
It's like a seed and when it's heard
It goes down deep, get's planted in our heart
Later on it sprouts up new
In joy and peace and goodness too
So listen to His word to play your part

Fruit so tender and so choice
When you listen to His voice
Learn the lesson from the seed
These the words that you should heed:

Fruit takes time, stay in the Vine
Plant it deep, it grows up high
The Life within will sprout, you can be sure
The Word has power, let it flower
Through the sun and through the shower
What you sow you'll reap and so much more

Fruit takes time, stay in the Vine
Plant it deep, it grows up high
The Life within will sprout, you can be sure
The Word has power, let it flower
Through the sun and through the shower
What you sow you'll reap and so much more

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6 thoughts on “Fake Plastic Trees (Country Hoedown)

  1. Paul Huxley

    Nice... something about the Yamaha keyboard makes me smile.

    Good lyrics, though I think the tree needs some pruning, maybe the first two into one...

    I assume the desired effect is for people to want to go and listen to Radiohead, is that right? That's what I'll do anyway.

  2. Tim V-B

    Glen - amazing! Really really enjoyed it. We're obsessed about instant results, aren't we?

    Just a few errata:
    "If you're standing half a mile away" (not "your")
    "So listen to His word to play your part" - you sing "your word"
    "Fruit takes time, stay in the Vine" - you sing "leave it on the vine"

    I don't suppose you have the music for these written down? Probably not. Someone out there must have the gift and time to turn these into musical scores. Anyone?

  3. glenscriv

    Yes Paul, perhaps some pruning is in order. What's the line: 'Don't bore us, cut to the chorus'? How much more true of kids songs! Enjoy Thom.

    Tim,

    I can provide guitar tab with chords (which a pianist should also be able to follow). And I'm talking to people about producing a decent quality CD - perhaps by end of year? Maybe Hannah will have a Christmas present in the post, we'll see.

  4. Missy

    That's not funny. I tried it. Removing the staples was painful - and yet so relieving. And I'd rather not say what a plastic grape can do to your tummy. :)

    Other than the fact that you're making fun of the way I talk, I think this is my favorite one, Glen. I'd buy your CD - 'cept now I've got 'em all for free. :P

  5. glenscriv

    Just wait for the remasters Missy! Stereo sound and maybe even people who can sing!!

    And yes your kind do speak funny (not that I can talk). I'll never forget "talking" to a Mississippi store clerk who, as far as I was concerned, used only three words in various combinations, interspersed with maniacal wheezing guffaws:

    Dog dawn diggitty. Diggitty dog dawn. Dog dog dog diggitty dag dawn diggitty hee hee hee hee hee hee!

    I smiled wide eyed and edged towards the door.

  6. Heather

    Was surfing your site and just came across this.

    Thought I'd let you know our 3 youngest loved it and my 4yo wanted to know if it was "Weird Al" :)

    As one who was previously panicking over the need for instant fruit, I can definitely relate to the need to listen to the Father's wise advice.

    Thanks!

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