Because click bait.
Anyway, here is yesterday’s Reading Between The Lines video: One Flesh
Essentially I just want to clear a space for a distinctive Christian sexual ethic and give some reasons for why we think in the peculiar way we do. In comments, a thoughtful YouTuber made some points (there weren’t any “accusations flying” at all I just put that in my heading to be sensational). “CaptainMikul” (not a Christian) made some excellent points. I’ve interspersed his questions with my answers.
I respect your view that I should have freedom in my own sexual ethic, but I don’t think you get the (rather nasty) sub text of what you are saying…
Marriage, man and woman, sex: Ferrari, beautiful.
Not marriage, man and woman, sex: Beat up old car, not beautiful.
Marriage, man and man, sex: Beat up old car, not beautiful.
Not marriage, woman and woman, sex: Beat up old car, not beautiful.
Hey, thanks for commenting. You’re right that I didn’t go into the male-female aspect of marriage here which I know is a huge issue but I’m trying to keep the videos under 8 minutes.
This means that the Ferrari/Lada analogy is not about hetero/homo-sexuality. I don’t have that issue in view at all in this video. The car analogy is simply about how we use sex. Is sex cheap? Is it for anyone or is it just for that one special person? Christians want to keep sex to “one careful owner” so to speak. That’s the point with the car analogy.
You’re assuming that all Christians must share your sexual ethic. You’re fine with me having my own and don’t want to legislate against it, and I respect that. But to other Christians who have a different sexual ethic to Christians like yourself, who say their relationship is a beat up old car and that Christians believe that, can have a really damaging effect on them.
On the issue of wanting other Christians to agree with me… well there are Biblical texts to be wrestled with. And I think I’m on safe ground to say “This is what Jesus taught about sex” and I think there are interpretations of Jesus’ teachings that are valid and interpretations that aren’t. People are free to believe what they like, but they are not free to re-write what was written. To use an analogy, You can be a free-market capitalist if you like, but you can’t claim that this was the true meaning of Das Kapital. “Marxism” is not infinitely flexible in what it affirms and denies and neither is Christianity.
And then your saying that this is because Jesus gets to dictate what is beautiful in your life. So the Son of God himself thinks that a guy and a guy are not beautiful? Why does he get to decide that, why does He even think that?
Jesus gets to tell us the deal with sex if He created it. I’d totally agree that, if He was just one more wise guru we could weigh His thoughts as an interesting 1st century, Jew. But if He made us and knows how life works then His teaching takes on a different character. That’s why the big question for a non-Christian is not “what do I think about Jesus’ sexual ethics?” but “Who does Jesus think He is to be speaking like this?” That’s the question I’d like non-Christians to be wrestling with.
Why does Jesus think sex operates like this? Well heaven and earth, man and woman, Christ and His people are these parallel pairings throughout the Bible (from the very first verse). And the Bible sees these pairs as “made for each other.” Man and woman coming together is part of a cosmic love story. It mirrors the way God loves the world, the way Christ gave Himself for His people. It’s about equal opposites combining in this life-giving way. No wonder then this how life comes to our species. Man and woman becoming one has been the way of life from the beginning. If man or woman “plays the field” that tells a different story to the cosmic love story. Likewise, Man sticking with man or woman sticking with woman tells a different story. For the Christian, sex means something beyond the sexual desires of the individuals involved. It is a proclamation of profound truths. Once again, I don’t expect you to agree with this sexual ethic because you don’t agree with the underlying “profound truths” but you asked why Jesus would even teach this stuff. And that’s the beginning of a sketch of an answer.
You seem alright, I doubt you have a bad bone in your body, but can you not see the problem of presenting as loving and beautiful a deity who dictates that others relationships are not worthy?
Thanks so much for the tone and thoughtfulness of your comment. I don’t see any problem with “a deity who” tells us what sex means in the world that he has made. The implications of that teaching are that there are more faithful and healthy uses of sex and less faithful and less healthy uses of sex. That seems absolutely consistent with a loving, beautiful God.
Let me finish with an analogy: If I was a Buddhist and this was a 7 minute video on the crazy-beautiful way of vegetarianism, would that be offensive? Imagine if I said in the video that “For Buddhists, meat is murder”? I imagine that most people would be completely fine if I said “Buddhists have a cosmic vision of life and meat-eating does not fit into it, so for us meat is forbidden.” I don’t imagine that there would be comments saying “I eat meat and I’m offended.” Or “Some of my best friends work in an abattoir, how dare you say they are unworthy!” I imagine everyone would shrug their shoulders and say “Fair enough, I disagree, pass me the bacon sandwich.” Why is this video different to that?
I haven’t yet received a response from him. But I’m thrilled that people are interacting on the issue.